The New American Devil's Dictionary: Part 1
AIR FORCE ONE: A vehicle designed to protect the President from events that require his presence.
ARGUMENT: A war between two or more parties, none of whom can afford weaponry.
BILL OF RIGHTS: An invoice for services not yet rendered.
CALVINIST: One who expresses his or her political beliefs by way of a urinating cartoon character affixed to their vehicle.
CATHOLIC: A long-lived religious faith that believes in sustaining the Laws of God by breaking the Laws of Man.
CHAD: The thin difference between democracy and totalitarianism.
COLONIALISM: Valet parking for tanks.
CONGRESS: The opposite of EGRESS, or more accurately a place where men go and never leave.
CONSERVATIVE: One who energetically defends the liberties of the individual through the passage of laws that restrict the liberties of others.
From Liberal Oasis, a hilarious piece by Mark Spittle.